the thrill is (almost) gone

 

            TUESDAY 10/26/21 4:10PM--I have, in the past, started (almost) counting the hours until Thursday 6PM...this week? not so much...I'll likely still go; it's a chance to play Bass; and I don't have to do anything else, except maybe sing a little...I think SueEl wants to go and she thinks it would be good for me...we'll see...
       I've given up on the idea of being in a Band...like I said, my Health is deteriorating and other than Musical ability, there's stuff working against me--mostly my looks and general demeanor...
7:33PM--suddenly I kinda wish I could wake up tomorrow and it would be Thursday...go figure...I gotta get my stuff outta my car--the bags, the amp and the guitar...I'm not taking any of it to Hershey's...
9:47PM--thinking of maybe bringing the chorus pedal with me though--and hopefully a cable...
WEDNESDAY 10/27/21 6:34PM--old habits die hard--getting a little excited about going to Hershey's tomorrow...If SueEl changes her Mind, and doesn't wanna go, I just might stay home...
THURSDAY-10/28/21(time unknown) I don’t wanna be here, but I am…SueEl sometimes gets a ride home from her roommate…I want that to happen tonight… On the way to pick up her up I hit...something. And then I drove away...I don't think the thing I hit was damaged much--if any, but my car took the brunt of the impact...
SLIGHTLY  LATER--So as you could imagine, the last place I wanted to be was Hershey's. I had no appetite, but I ate some chicken anyway...Eventually, reluctantly, I started playing (Bass) and put the incident behind me, for the time being...a couple I was chatting with, after advising them that they shouldn't sit too close to the front, know a LOT of the musicians I know or have known...The Man, Bob Bloomer, is Brother to Bill Bloomer--a Bass player I've known for a LONG time...Every time Bob mentioned a name, it was someone I've known--with one exception...and the conversation helped me forget the accident...
FRIDAY 10/29/21 9:12AM--it suddenly occured to me that the Universe is probably gonna wait until I've completely forgotten the acccident (if I can) and then hit me with whatever punishment it can cook up for me......

Don’t argue with the Universe

 

             SUNDAY 10/24/21 12:30PM-I think it’s fairly obvious that the Universe didn’t want me to be here at Riley‘s lock… Major equipment problems, a disappointed roommate…a bad hair day…I  ABSOLUTELY  should’ve stayed home today, and if I have MY way I’m never coming back here…except that I CAN still sing a little…so who knows?
4:25PM--just got homr from Riley's...I can only imagine what people are/will be saying about my behavior at the Riley's Lock Jam, the early part of it at least...it's an Ego thing I know, but I just want people to like what I do, and it feels good when they let me know that they like what I do--but *I* wanna like what I do too and until I gave up on trying to be a guitarist and switched to vocals only, I didn't like what I was doing at all...my singing seemed to surprise people......The Jam (I think) was typical--no one was in charge and everyone was in charge...and as always, some Musicians are just better than others...the whole point of the Jam is to have fun,  right? 
MONDAY 10/25/21 9:05AM--if I can get the kitchen/living room straigtened up, my reward should be going to Dietle's tonight, likely with SueEl...
2;02PM whether I deserve it or not, I'm probably gonna go to Dietle's tonight...
7:30PM-should’ve stayed home tonight too…driving in the dark is hard enough, add to that a blinding rain and yer asking for trouble-and I had plenty…
8:24PM- played some Bass behind SueEl…it felt like a tree trunk…luckily I was able to switch to the “house “ Bass, which is a bit easier to play…
11:12PM--I briefly thought about going out tomorrow night, then I came to my senses...as for Thursday, I should probably stay home...that doesn't mean I will...it's OK to go to an open mic or a jam and not play or sing a single note...
TUESDAY 10/26/21 11:19AM--I came to the realization that I'm probably done being in a Band...mostly because I have lousy stage precence, lousy posture (which is a part of stage presence) and I'm far from handsome...not to mention my body is fading quickly...a kinda sad day, to put it mildly...
12:44PM--it may be wrong, it's probably an Ego thing, but I couldn't feel less like a member of the MoCo music community if I still lived in Glen Burnie...

undecided

 

      FRIDAY 10/22/21 10PM--what *I* thought of as bossy is, to some folks, enthusiasm...OK. I'll buy that one I guess...the bossy/enthusiastic guitarist apparently recorded the whole open mic...he sent me a file (I guess that's what it's called) via e-mail...gonna make a CD for myself, tomorrow maybe...
SATURDAY 10/23/21 9PM--suddenly I wanna go to the Riley' Lock Jam tomorrow...I don't if I can get there when I want to, which is 11:30...I'm hoping to get there by Noon...there's a chance I can get there sooner...I have to go get the groceries from Giant...They're supposed to be ready at 11AM..IF they're on time I should be able to be home by 11:20...it shouldn't take more than 10 minutes to put the groceries away...my car will (hopefully) be cleaner (inside) than it is now...I'll take the Blues Jr. outta the trunk, and put the Rumble 14 in it...what I'm not sure of is whether I should take stomp boxes or the gizmo...right NOW I'm thinking "stomp boxes"--dirt, chorus and reverb...I hope to do a comprehensive test tomorrow morning...I already did a mini test to see what Butterscotch (a Strat) sounds like thru my little BASS amp...It sounded good to me...
9:47PM--judging from my research, there's nothing wrong with using a Rumble 15 as a guitar amp...I'm actually kinda optimistic about it, almost excited...

on second thought

 

                SATURDAY 10/16/21 8:55AM--A day or so ago I really wanted to form a band with a singer I met at Hershey's...now I'm not sure if it would be a good fit or not...
12:20PM-I’m thinking I might possibly maybe go to Gentleman Jim’s tonight…A former bandmate invited me to his gig and expressed the idea that he hoped I was OK… I just might go see his band (In ToneNation)... there’s a former member of the LCB in it – Joe Dyson is the guitar player…
8:00PM-made it to GJ’s, in spite of some major car trouble…ended up singing GREEN RIVER...I did a very good job, conceited as that sounds...but it's true...SueEl was there, we hung out together...I thank the Universe for Dianne…and I’m glad I have a Best Buy Visa credit card, I'm probably gonna need it to get the car problem solved...
SUNDAY 10/17/21  11:46AM--so, overnight the band leader (Dave) indicated that it's not outta the question that Joe Dyson's days in the band are numbered...I should say no more...
12:30PM--but now I'm in Fantasyland, with regards to the text message from David...
MONDAY 10/18/21 10:27AM--the Plan is to go to Dietle's tonight, with or without SueEl...I'm allowed to change my Mind though... 9PM-I was so excited about coming to DIETLE’S tonight… Now I think it was a big mistake; I DID manage to make it through Folsom prison blues and little sister, but I was not happy about the guitar sound I was getting and I used my guitar but not my own amplifier…my vocals were pretty good…I DID get to play Bass, AND drums!!! I wish I’d left the drums alone…what the f*ck was I thinking?
TUESDAY 10/19/21 9:35AM--SueEl told me that Joe D. has apparently been difficult to work with for some time...Perhaps I'm being overly optimistic, but I'm hoping to hear from Dave almost any day now... 
THURSDAY 10/21/21 12:48PM--at this point in time, SueEl is not up to going to Hershey's tonight...I know I shouldn't be, but I'm relieved...EDIT--I spoke too soon, now she wants to go...Dianne is having a meeting with a financial advisor at 6, so I'll leave to go to Hershey's after first going to (probably) McDs to get Dinner...
7:25PM-Hershey’s used to be fun…or maybe I’m just tired…
8PM- I think I lost the possible gig  with In Tone Nation…Dave tells me that he and Joe have made up, at least for now…and naturally I had my hopes up…oh well…Jeff just indicated he was going to play one more…but he’s still playing, and that’s OK…SueEl just left...
10:36PM--there's a certain guitarist who comes across to me as bossy...he's a really good player, but he sorta rolled right over Steve last night...oh well...
12:20PM--I said something on FB about not liking a lack of discipline at an open mic and Ray weighed in about how hard it is to maintain discipline, so anarchy is the natural result...it feels like Ray and I are drifting apart--AGAIN...belatedly getting bummed about not getting into InToneNation...oh well...

Will it make any difference?

 

           SUNDAY 10/10/21 3:33PM-I haven’t talked  to her lately, but I think SueEl and I are going to an open mic tomorrow evening… Frankly, it’s out of my way to go and pick her up and bring her back down to Rockville, but that’s where the open mic is…
              It’s some sort of “rock and roots” jam, which I think stylistically limits what I can do…I don’t expect to hear any Neil Young, Tom Petty, Bruce, Dylan…certainly no Grateful Dead… I don’t know WHAT songs SueEl and I are going to do; maybe she has some ideas… I suppose I could do Little Sister if necessary…
11:18PM--everytime I look thru Flakebook I get depressed about being one of MontCo's  best kept Musical secrets...that's reason enought to avoid it...
MONDAY 10/11/21 12:45PM--and it hurts to see all the SLR vids...I think about what might have been had she been able to stay in Montgomery Co. Or maybe I wasn't as good for/with her as I thought I was...
2:25PM--SueEl and I are still planning to go to Dietle's this evening...I have no idea what's gonna happen...I don't like being in the dark, but that's where I am...
7:22PM-made it to Dietle’s…I doubt that I’ll make it a regular stop…but ya never know…seen an acquaintance from many years back…
9PM-I might be coming back after all…there doesn’t seem to be many places to play Country music in MontCo…Steve Setzer (from Hershey's) was there as well...
9:28PM-played the Fender P-bass that belongs to the guy who runs the open mic...his name is Brad…I could get used to that, if I had to…I added harmony to one of the singer's songs...luckily he didn't mind...EDIT--he and I are FB friends now...
TUESDAY 10/12/2112:11AM--just got in from Dietle's...I hope to go next Monday...with or without SueEl...I gotta brush up on my Country repertoire...I haven't done any Country music since the CSA Jamboree...it definitely feels (right now) like a new place to go regularly--and NOT be in a band of any kind...I may need some "cheat sheets" for awhile though...as loose as it is, I really like going to Hershey's on Thursdays...on the other hand I can't wait to go to Dietle's as a guitarist...
11:05PM--just got in from Hershey's...after Dinner there with SueEl, I was on the sidelines for awhile then played Bass for most of the evening...SueEl did great; eventually Doug, her roomate took her home...a female acquaintence from the recent past was there--naturally I can't yet remember her name...EDIT--her name is Dorothy...

Then what?

 

                    SUNDAY 10/3/21 7:09AM- at this point I’m undecided about which Ray gig I wanna do…
9:35AM--I might make more money at S&J's, but only a litte more...I'd rather catch up on my sleep..
12:42PM--I MIGHT do both, and pay the price tomorrow...
 2:26PM-I’ve decided to do the Brian Boru gig;  I should be back home by 8:30 PM… I don’t expect to make more than forty dollars…actually there’s another performer’s equipment on stage, maybe Ray and I are going to be using that stuff – who knows? As far as I know we’re playing inside… That’s a good thing…mostly because it’s really hot outside…I think there’s something wrong with my phone, but I don’t have time to find out now… It’s been acting weird all weekend in various ways…
Ray seems to be running late, or because he doesn’t have to set up any equipment, he has time to kill… Those are the only answers I have;
Suddenly, I feel like the gig is in danger of being canceled… Ray isn’t here yet and HE might be the one to cancel it…I really hope the Universe doesn’t want me to go to Stan and Joe’s ; already I don’t feel like it
5 PM – if I wanna come home with any money at all, I have to go to stand in Joe’s… There’s maybe eight people here not counting the band , The tip jar is nearly empty; I think there’s a $20 bill in it
MONDAY 9/4/21 3AM--I've just spent the last 12 hours doing two things--driving and playing Music...the driving used up maybe two hours, the rest of the time I was playing behind Ray Weaver...Dianne was right of course, I feel like I've been hit by a train...
10:25AM--recovering from the TWO Ray gigs...the 2nd one went really well, except for missing a turn and taking a long way home...I made no money at the first gig and $60 bucks at the 2nd one...
11:23AM--and so I'm back to feeling like MontCo's best kept Musical secret...that is, nearly invisible in my own neighborhood...Ray expressed his opinion of the musicians who have been backing him up...I wonder what he would say about me if I'm not around…
THURSDAY 10/7/21 4PM--the plan is to go to Hershey's...I gotta bring Jeff's Bass amp back for one thing and I hope to do some Bass playing myself if possible...
10:16PM--I played Bass for roughly half of the Jam...I was quite tired when Jeff showed up with a Bass and a new amp that he just got, today I think...I did some lead singing as well...I seem to know LOTSA songs...and I even seemed to lead the Band once or twice...but I have the worst stage prescence of anyone I know, and I dunno how to change it...
         The same musicians seem to show up every Thursday...*I* think the jam needs some new players...I for one feel that way...maybe the hosts feel that way too...maybe the players feel that way about ME...Next Thursday I might go to Bippy's Pub...maybe every other Thursday I'll go to Hershey's...

 

If only it was permanent

 

                   FRIDAY 10/1/21 9:21AM-hoping to play another gig tonight with Ray Weaver… Suddenly my fantasy is that he moves back here to America and we do this a lot more often…he HAS talked about someday possibly maybe leaving Denmark… which is kind of weird, considering his mother passed away recently…other than his sisters and a daughter in Tennessee (?)  he has no reason to come back to America that I can think of…his only son is currently attending school in England, so theoretically it wouldn’t matter where Ray and his wife live...I don’t really know, but I suspect that he would do a lot better financially if he stays in Denmark… America is overflowing with musicians trying to make it to the big time; which includes lots of singer-songwriters…
               NOON--the Universe is REALLY messing with me now...Ray wants me to play BASS!!! and Jeff is letting me borrow his Bass amp!!! there's no way I'm gonna get a nap now...I DO hope Ray doesn't want me to play lead guitar on anything...
1:35PM--AND Ray wants me to bring my guitar stuff as well--(sheesh) I'm not gonna tell him most of that stuff is in the car already...he says Johnny will be late...we'll just have to (as always) play it by ear...
               SATURDAY 10/2/21 12:40AM--just got home from Killarney House...I played Bass until Gary John Peresta arrived; then I tried  running my guitar thru the Bass amp--to me it sounded terrible, so I brought my guitar amp in and hooked everything up...I felt better after that...at the very end of the night, we did a mostly acoustic set--I didn't necessarily want to, but it was fun...the singer inside me woke up...
5:30PM--still recovering from last night's Ray gig...even if I could make it to Ray's first Sunday gig, I think it would be wiser to go to the second one--maybe...perhaps it depends on when we get back from Dianne's super duper early medical appointment in Frederick...we'll see what we shall see...doing the second gig means (probably) getting home at one or two in the morning Monday...yikes...
 9:10PM--If I get up at 5AM to go to Frederick and manage to make it back home by 11AM, maybe I can catch a few Zs before theoretically leaving for Brian Boru at 1:30 or so...I suppose I could eat Lunch on the way to the gig in Severna Park...
SUNDAY  10/3/21 9:07AM--we got back from Frederick around eight o'clock...naptime is about an hour away...how long it's gonna last is anyone's guess...I'm hoping to make it to the 1st of the two shows...I should be back home by 8:30 or so...
9:35AM--I might make more money at S&J's, but only a litte more...I'd rather catch up on my sleep...
12:42PM--I MIGHT do both, and pay the price tomorrow...
MONDAY 9/4/21 3AM--I've just spent the last 12 hours doing two things--driving and playing Music...the driving used up maybe two hours, the rest of the time I was playing behind Ray Weaver...Dianne was right of course, I feel like I've been hit by a train...