restraint, something I'm not good at

                   TUESDAY 2/12/19 7PM--I want very much to be cool calm and collected at the audition tomorrow...that's what Xanax is for...I'm gonna try  to be laid back and mellow...not gonna hold my breath...and I don't wanna play every riff I know in the first  half dozen songs, or less...in fact, I don't wanna play too many standard riffs at all..I'm planning to make a dry run to the drummer's house in the morning (after rush hour) so I don't get lost after sunset...
               I'm gonna use the guitar amp that is already there--nervous about THAT too...NOT bringing the gizmo, just three stomp boxes--"dirt", chorus, and EQ...obviously, I'm gonna shower and shave and put on clean clothes...would like to get a short nap after Lunch, but I probably won't...I've forgotten when it is, but I think there's an actual gig in the near future...
WEDNESDAY 2/13/19 8:15AM--gonna make the dry run to the site of my audition; hoping to leave here at 9AM and get back at about 10:30 or so...planning on an early Dinner, at about 4:30 or so...which means an early Lunch...gotta leave time to shower shave and pack...hoping to leave here at 5:30--right in the middle of rush hour...the audition starts at 7...like always, I wanna be early...sundown is at approximately 5:42...
          11AM--went to White Oak, found the drummer's house, turned around and came home...I stopped off at MyEyeDr. and got my glasses fixed--they replaced the missing nose piece and replaced the other one...
12:12PM--getting really nervous...I hope ONE Xanax is enough...it's all in the timing...the Plan is to take one and then leave to go to the audition...
3:03PM--almost forgot that tomorrow is Valentine's Day...I took care of that, for $30 bucks...bringing the amp, just in case...the Manchester bag is (I think) packed and ready to go...the Plan is to sit down to Dinner at 4:30 if not a teeny bit sooner...which means I should be outta the shower and shaved by 4:15PM...
4:10PM--all clean and clean shaven...cooking the baked potato...hope/expect to be done Dinner by 5:15 or so...